las vegas, bingo, more county fairin, eating drinking, beach housing (right arrow to advance)

this is almost too embarassing to share but it also makes me laugh like a maniac in my head. i was on my friend’s roof the other nite to enjoy some fresh air which unintentionally turned into us “playing Rear Window”. we noticed that there was a quiet party in one of the windows directly across and in a half drawn shaded window next door, 2 sets of extremely large bare calves in athletic ankle socks were pacing around the floor closely, possibly about to get down. lights out, no action. we kept talking about how these were the biggest calves we’d ever seen and tried to figure out which ones belonged to a man or a woman, or whether they were same-sex calves. i proceed to take pictures of a few buildings because the lighting is ethereal at that hour in cameraland.

anyway, the next day i take a look at the pictures and in one of them, something seems a little off.

i’m getting a weird vibe looking at it. i zoom in closer, and oh my god! i think there is a guy in there.

and oh my god, he’s staring right at me. looking all retired porno actor in a robe with nothing underneath? could it be? this dude is MY personal Raymond Burr. and it was around 1:30am so it seemed a majority of the neighbors were asleep. seemed.

haha! just when you think you’re alone, there is a naked dude in a robe quietly staring at you.

i lost my favorite dress in a tacky hotel in seedy downtown las vegas. at least my last few moments with her were meaningful.

right arrow to advance

right arrow to advance

young forwarded me these “landscape” beef propaganda ads

they are fun and a little gross. i kinda want a steak so it’s not that gross, but still. the cliff one reminds me of the Point Reyes Seashore.

i am on a losing streak when it comes to rentals this week. first this boring and predictable thriller called Fracture and then this sci-fi dystopian action flick called Equilibrium.

(8:25:56 AM) audrey: i watched equilibrium last night, that movie was mega corny
(8:26:09 AM) audrey: last time i listen to you
(10:40:45 AM) woo: i didnt say it was classic
(10:46:12 AM) audrey: That part where Christian Bale risks his life to save a puppy because it licked his face is so corny
(10:46:33 AM) audrey: You just like movies where puppies are protected by futuristic machine gun toting martial arts freaks
(11:03:20 AM) woo: maybe true
(11:06:05 AM) woo: watch big rig
(11:06:10 AM) audrey: NO
(11:06:13 AM) woo: yes
(11:06:14 AM) audrey: i’m not listening to you anymore
(11:06:19 AM) woo: shut your face
(11:07:02 AM) woo: you would have watched equilibrium eventually anyway
(11:07:15 AM) audrey: no i wouldn’t, it got lousy reviews
(11:07:15 AM) woo: you wish christian bale would come to your house and yell at you

yesterday i had lunch with coworkers outside the ferry building. somehow pirates came up in the conversation and i mentioned there are pirates today still but they sport ak-47s instead of swords. i had to leave early to get back to work and on the walk back, i see a freaking PIRATE SHIP in the bay. On top of that, i heard explosions that sounded like cannons.

back at the office, i told everyone that i saw a pirate ship firing cannons in the bay and NOBODY believe me. “audrey i think you had too much wine” “sure there was a pirate ship”. i barely even had one glass of wine.

so this morning one of my coworkers comes by with the SF Chronicle and lo and behold, my “imaginary” pirate ship is on the front page of the paper with a caption about it firing cannons.

VINDICATED, BITCHES!

right arrow to advance to next pic

i don’t know how or why i have this, but this cuban cover of a franz ferdinand song came on my itunes by a side project of BV Social Club Ibrahim Ferrer and Omara Portuondo and i kinda really like it:

it’s sunday morning and i’m doing what i do every sunday morning - drinking coffee at my computer while browsing the interweb and listening to albums i haven’t played in a while before heading out to breakfast. my internal alarm clock goes off at 8am no matter what. not complaining, i love being an early riser cause no one is up when i am.

anyway, i need a late pass because i just discovered this site Passive Aggressive Notes which is a site where people submit hilarious hostile notes people leave. i’m cracking up reading some of these to the Black Caesar soundtrack. In the 10 years of shared housing experience i have, i am lucky i have never had to deal with a roommate who left notes.

i just ordered this cake for my coworker’s birthday and am super pumped to eat it. on a related note, i don’t know how i stumbled upon these but they are rule bigtime:

i caught the all star homerun derby on TV last night and now officially admire the hell out of rangers outfielder josh hamilton. how this guy can come back from a hardcore addiction to alcohol, heroin and crack to completely dominate the home run derby by mashing 28 home runs in the first round (3 of them past 500 feet) is beyond me. this guy is for real. not to mention he is leading the major-league in RBIs with a ridiculous 95 before the all star break. WTF? his comeback story is like a real life awesome baseball movie. or as hamilton puts it, proof that hope is never lost.

i need to have a cute baby javelina like this boy. odd that they aren’t members of the pig family.

I also need a garden so I can put this zombie garden sculpture in it and scare people

yesterday, the first 20,000 attendees at yankee stadium got fake mustaches. This is because that gross one on jason giambi’s face is so popular at the moment and helped improve his batting average. i wish the giants or a’s had hilarious fan giveaway days like this.

right arrow to advance