rest in peace polaroid film

mike: uh huh ok whatsup shutup
audrey: you shut up
audrey: happy valentine’s day. go practice making out with your pillow
mike: go stick some peanut butter in your dogs mouth so he will kiss you
audrey: you’re the one with a dog
mike: i dont need peanut butter
mike: he loves me
mike: did you see juno?
audrey: no
audrey: i’m not into those quirkie indie flicks like you are
mike: dont label me
mike: just cause you like documentarys on cow roping doesnt mean you can hate on my movies
audrey: you’re killing me today
mike: i got off work early im in a good mood
mike: but talking to you is ruining it

i am a dollarnaire

i don’t even know

i don’t think i like headlocks

i recently starting using facebook only so i could play scrabble. anyway, one of my current games is with brian (my former roommate, fellow member of the Outdoorsy Adventure Club and super competitive friend). i lose so much at scrabble that i don’t/can’t care about my track record anymore, i’m deep in the ditches. but it’s extra fun to score big points off of brian cause he gets so mad. young realizes this too, and when he came over to watch project runway tonight, i told him it was my turn against brian on scrabble. he too likes getting brian mad competition wise, the pay off is too big and satisfying. so he looked at my letters and wrote down a million hypothetical combinations so i could get a word with the most points. i didn’t use any of them cause i know brian would accuse me of cheating, but i had to share. i’ve lost so many times during scrabble but there is a certain satisfaction when scoring big against brian because he gets comically angry/belligerent, totally jackie gleason style.

stupid young. i watched all of those jason bourne movies for the first time this past week and got really into it and what did he do? this:

just because in theory i think it’s cool to be able to get a eurothug in a chokehold while cussing him out in french/russian/german/italian or spanish, it does NOT mean i want to marry MOR matt damon.

oh this pic is from a previous soul night not nye

i went to soul night on nye at the elbo which is normally on saturday and it was good times. i haven’t gone since july. i was kinda paranoid that it would be too crowded cause nye is amateur night and people who never go out feel obligated to go out on this night and drink more than they can handle and i hate witnessing drive-by public vomiting, fights on the sidewalk, and drunk driving. but my night turned out a lot more fun than i thought it could be. anyway, soul night here is great because everyone dances – including all the deejays, and they are fun to watch. besides all the great 60s soul 45s, i also think the crowd gets hype and dances because the dj is hyped. and this is not any self-conscious half-ass dancing either, lots of people seriously just spazz out on the dancefloor and aren’t afraid to look foolish. i can dork out and reenact moves from the blues brothers movie if i want to and no one would even notice. not that i would ever do something like that.

they gave out x-ray specs and stupid hats and favors. the crowd crouches down to the floor slow when the song starts to get quiet when paul paul orders them to get on the floor. then everyone jumps up with their arms in the air when the song gets loud again. it is that kind of atmosphere, check it out. i took a mess of pics last night and put together a slideshow because i think i need to start doing that when i have too many pictures.

this right here is probably the funniest thing young has ever done. young is the type of person who thinks he’s funnier than he actually is, so i am really proud of him for once succeeding in an attempt to be funny all the while staying true to his stifling annoying attributes.

somewhat related

9:41 AM me: when i was in the middle of that text message to you talking about emma’s dad’s homemade sausages smelling so good, it was my turn to bowl so i left my phone on the table. brian and katie saw it and thought wtf? like i was texting **** about sausages smelling good and they thought it was some kind of weird sexual thing

9:43 AM Young: HAHAHAHAHA

that’s hilarious

me: i know

they were looking at me weird when i came back to the table after i bowled

9:44 AM Young: aww, i wish i went

me: i had to convince them that i was texting you about real food

ayres, morse code and the homie mike 2600 deejayed the party at milk last friday. serg jumped up and down forever in the count crackula puppet head mask. i had a blast.

mike2600 and herm

herm’s pics

ayres and morsecode

me being a nerd in the club

rosshogg and neta

mike 2600

me and serg

serg drunk and blind and jumping on stage like a maniac

the knockout is my favorite neighborhood bar. they have the only color photo booth i know of in the city, they carry budget beers i like such as miller high life, sometimes bands i like play there, and thursdays is bingo night from 8-10 followed by club donuts

you get a bingo card with every drink.

just kidding. those aren’t all mine.

i won early and chose a ping pong set for some dumb reason.

lindsay was smart and chose a plant

i ran into my old friend Cas which was a nice surprise. he moved here last week from san diego

he’s fast with the face-cover whenever i break out a camera. here’s an example from 5 years ago

here’s the stage the bands play on sometimes

after bingo was club donuts, a bi-weekly nite where bands like lightning bolt and tussle have played on. sometimes it’s an all DJ nite of disco, post-punk, no-wave, robot music blah blah

you know it begins when there is the mysterious placement of donuts on bar counters and tables by some kind of donut ghost. like the tooth fairy or santa claus.

i killed my sister’s car battery when i tried to go on a beer run and freaked out for a minute. then when everthing was hunkydory again, i reverted to obnoxiousness. i feel sorry for my friends sometimes.

young, brian, katie, mike and i got up early and took the ferry to angel island on saturday. we thought it might rain, so brian bought us all rain ponchos from the dollar store and was going to make me wear the neon pink one. luckily it didn’t. we walked through fog in the morning, then when it burned off we ate sandwiches and bread pudding that young made. it was fun.

there were some abandoned broken down buildings that looked like they could have come from that children of men movie…or maybe even baghdad.

young was threatening to throw this clump of mossy dirt at me and kept saying there was mites in it. i tried to ward him off with a stick and “accidentally” jabbed his hand. that’ll learn him

later that evening i went to the bourbon and branch speakeasy for kristy’s birthday.

bridget, kevin & kristy

we were in a room that was supposed to look like a library. i was hoping that i could pull out a book from one of the shelves and trigger the whole wall to flip around and reveal a bunch of skeletons and a secret stairway like in the movies. but this place wasn’t for real, the drinks were $10 -$18 each. yikes? i am more a beer person, so i had a bit of anxiety holding a martini glass cause i feel like any minute someone could bump into me and wear my $10 drink. luckily we didn’t stay too long (it was so crowded) and i was able to switch to beer.

ok maybe i am the only one who finds them intimidating…

Alexis:
“He looks like he’s singing karaoke and can’t hear if he’s on-key or not,
and maybe his friends are laughing at him”

Young:
“Hahaha, that picture is hilarious. It looks like all the penguins are
standing around laughing at the fatass who can’t get up.”

my new friend alexis is showing some stuff at this opening at 111 minna tonight. her collages rule!!

check out her site www.plantimals.com

last nite i went over to my pal young’s apt to watch a movie but then we got distracted cause he just got a new mac and we started indulging in geekery with the apple photo booth app:

milhouse and burns

oh my gosh, i’m an alien

mark ryden where you at

bunnyhead sun

do NOT fuck with this bunnyhead