we get these email subs at work related to newsworthy or interesting developments in product liability and i found this particular case so hilarious.

David S. Ide sued The Foreign Candy Co. Inc. and Dollar Tree Stores Inc., alleging that his consumption of at least two gum balls resulted in burns and other mouth injuries.

Ide seeks damages for negligence and breach of implied warranty of merchantability. Retailer Dollar General sold the gum balls that caused the alleged injuries. Ide claims that his wife purchased a package of “The Original Mega Warheads Sour Gum” at the Dollar Tree in Ashland, Mass. The product contains a warning on the box that informs consumers that eating multiple pieces within a short period of time may cause temporary irritation to sensitive tongues and mouths.

On June 7, 2001, Ide claims, he put at least two gum balls, and possibly up to four gum balls, in his mouth at the same time. He claims that the product tasted different from Warheads he had consumed on previous occasions. He claims that he immediately spit out the gum balls and went to the hospital.

Ide was given pain-killing medication. A week later he went to see an ear, nose and throat specialist, who diagnosed and treated him for an inflammation of the mucous membrane. Three months later the same doctor treated him for an inflammation of the tongue.

A Superior Court jury returned a verdict in favor of the defendants. Judge Greco denied Ide’s motion for a new trial, finding that there was no evidence of negligence by either defendant, that the evidence of causation was weak and that the warning on the defendant’s product was adequate.

imagine what would happen if the plaintiff tried pop rocks, or one of these. i also like that dude put four of these gum balls into his mouth at the same time. i can just picture him spitting them out and calling 911 on his bluetooth earpiece.

are so awesome. i want to visit one so badly! a crazy ass one that i might need help out of

instead of those corny haunted houses set up at fairgrounds and malls, they should have a halloween hedge maze and set up a million fog machines overhead and pass out flashlights. maybe hide speakers in the hedges and play some spooky music like throbbing gristle or nurse with wound. that’s it. no dudes hiding in bloody rubber masks who spring out on you, just tons of fog, dark music and the night sky. actually, setting up a frozen jack nicholson dummy somewhere in there would be hilarious.

goddamn, i should run a hedge maze business.

ok so i talked a big game about being rick nielsen for halloween, but i am lazy and now i don’t think i have time or energy to get it together. so now i think i am going to be a hamburger, which is kind of pathetic. the last time i put any effort into a costume was 2 years ago with tippi hedren which i was ridiculously proud of. i feel like a geezer who tries to relive his HS football glory days.

oh well, my search for ideas was fruitful because i ended up finding this amazing breakfast mask which i intend on purchasing for personal use.

and this t-shirt doesn’t haven’t anything to do with halloween, but i am buying it because some wizard out there read my mind and wants me to look fabulous

i fixed the levels on the mix cause it bothered me when i listened to it again. hooray for cool edit

i thought this photo of civil defense workers near the beirut international airport was pretty compelling

here is john stewart breaking down how Israel used to handle its hostage crises.
not really something to try to make light of, but it is on point.

Playlist for July 18th, 2006

Erase Errata � “Dust”
Thinking Fellers Union - “More Glee”
The Birthday Party - “Sonny’s Burning”
Magazine - “Rhythm of Cruelty”
Robyn Hitchcock - “1974″
The Clean - “Billy Two”
XTC - “Paper and Iron”
Pavement - “Newark Wilder”
Neil Hagerty - “Carrier Dog”
Stereolab - “Plastic Mile”
Dungen - “Festival”
Vivien Goldman - “Launderette”
The Who - “Love is Like (a Heatwave)”
The Primitives - “Oh Mary”
Josef K - “Heads Watch”
Battleship - “Song for Lucy Stone”
Chrome - “Chromosome Damage”
Broadcast - “America’s Boy”
Radio Birdman - “Burn My Eye”
Guv’ner - “Amplituden”
Blonde Redhead - “Melody of Certain 3″
Essential Logic - “The Order Form”

hi, i’m at work with work to do but have done nothing so far today except upload photos and bid on nes games due to fixing my blinking light problem on the console. sorry i’ve nothing interesting to report because i’ve mostly been lazy.

for all you dirty caddyshack lovers, they will be showing it at Dolores Park on Thursday, 7/13 9PM for Film Night in the Park.

also check out these macro shots of simultaneously disgusting and beautiful insects. i want to bite this one cause it looks like it’s filled with fruit juice of some sort:

rest in peace special guy

jesus, i forgot kyle maclachlan did a twin peaks snl sketch. pretty hilarious. check out phil hartman’s impression of leland palmer made me cry laugh

Playlist for July 4th, 2006

Royal Trux - “Follow the Winner”
The Slits - “Love Und Romance”
Kill Me Tomorrow - “Sweet Device”
100 Flowers - “Head, No Heart”
The Fall - “Simon’s Dream”
Destroy All Monsters - “You’re Gonna Die”
John Cale - “Ghost Story”
Red Krayola - “Old Tom Clark”
The Barrier - “Dawn Breaks Through”
Lilys - “The Tennis System (and its stars)”
The Soft Boys - “Leppo and the Jooves”
Debris - “Leisurely Waiting”
B-52s - “52 Girls”
Family Fodder - “Savoir Faire”
Brian Eno - “The Great Pretender”
Josephine Foster - “Crackerjack Fool”
Captain Beefheart - “Obeah Mean”
Flying Burrito Bros. - “Christine’s Tune”
Unwound - “Demon Sings Love Songs”
Dinosaur Jr. - “Let it Ride”
Von LMO - “Radio World”

god i am so excited

link

black suit and that guy from wings as sandman. and venom is in here somewhere. jesus.
i heart peter parker 4-ever, i heart sam raimi 4-ever.
too bad i have to wait another year.

sidenote: i realized recently that i think kevin spacey is terribly annoying.

i also found out that m. night shyamalanam or whatever has another damn movie out and wish he would go away so i wouldn’t see another trailer that starts out with “From the brilliant mind of M. Night Shymamalamam…” i am starting to find that there are others out there that find him and his movies as unbearable as I do…

there’s that american epxress ad with him that makes me want to throw up. his daydreaming is just so imaginative and brilliantly spooky. in case you didn’t know, that is what masterful geniuses do. they daydream half-horror/halfwannabe-hitchcock shit in expensive restaurants until some sycophantic nut interrupts them for their autograph and they graciously oblige and smile complacently into the distance.

in case you want to throw up yourself, here you go:

i wish this guy would go away.

i really don’t want to blather on about all the crap i did on my birthday cause i am kinda braindead. But i will say that that Walzwerk is my new favorite restaurant. Those biers ruled and I wanted to eat everything that was on the table even the stuff that didn’t belong to me.

one of my sisters got me an iTunes gift card and I feel weird about buying music off there, so I downloaded two Shark Week specials from the Discovery Channel cuz I got a video ipod now and can plug it into the TV.

One special is about some man who rides 14-ft hammerheads like horses. FUCK YES.

so i had a really shitty week that consisted of being disoriented and getting on the wrong BART train that went to oakland instead of home, hot water repeatedly running out in the shower after 5 minutes which forced me to take cold showers like a psycho (which resulted in me mean-mugging everyone for the rest of the day), and a heavy victorian window slamming shut on my forearm when i tried to scare a pigeon away because of the obnoxious pigeon sex sounds. co-workers have been eyeballing my bruised-all-over arm like i am the victim of domestic violence. awesome

but i turned 27 today.

here’s praying this year will be full of great things. Calgon, take me away to a good bar with cheap drinks like now

Office facades - a lot of us have to do it to eat and everything, but damn I am sitting here in my cubicle and heard my cube “neighbor” talking on the phone to her boss and she says in a perky manner, “Have fun in Maine!” causing me to guffaw out loud. And I mean LOUD loud. I should not have done that, but come on, “Have fun in Maine!”?? Jesus Christ, KILL THAT NOISE

my new friend alexis is showing some stuff at this opening at 111 minna tonight. her collages rule!!

check out her site www.plantimals.com

$180,000 for a Trans-Am song?!?!?!

I’m kinda scared/sad that the Hummer ad-execs even know who LiLiPut is.

#1: Werner Saves Joaquin Phoenix:

After the vehicle rolled over on its roof, Phoenix, who was wearing his seatbelt was flung into the passenger side. He told the Times he felt “a bit confused.”

Enter Herzog.

“I remember this knocking on the passenger window,” Phoenix said. “There was this German voice saying, ‘Just relax.’ There’s the air bag. I can’t see, and I’m saying, ‘I’m fine. I am relaxed.’ ”

“Finally, I rolled down the window and this head pops inside. And he said, ‘No, you’re not.’ And suddenly I said to myself, ‘That’s Werner Herzog!’ ” There’s something so calming and beautiful about Werner Herzog’s voice. I felt completely fine and safe. I climbed out.”

#2: Werner isn’t bothered by getting shot during interviews

The 63-year-old was chatting with movie journalist Mark Kermode about his documentary Grizzly Man, when a sniper opened fire with an air rifle.

Kermode explains, “I thought a firecracker had gone off.

“Herzog, as if it was the most normal thing in the world, said, ‘Oh, someone is shooting at us. We must go.’

“He had a bruise the size of a snooker ball, with a hole in. He just carried on with the interview while bleeding quietly in his boxer shorts.”